Given that I am a Happiness Youth Mentor and my topic is focused more on the “beautiful things in life” I tend to write more on the positive side, but always trying to shed some light on the reality that goes behind the day to day of our lives and self worth.
So here comes a piece of my story for those of you who are struggling to break a pattern or don’t seem to find it possible to free yourselves from toxic relationships.
When I was younger, I went through several romantic relationships. I had the loving kind, the male chauvinist type, and the one who I allowed to verbally abuse me (once we had broken up – but I still allowed it).
Through the years I realized that I didn’t value myself enough and I allowed these situations and toxic people into my life. I don’t blame any of them, in fact, I thank them for teaching me the importance of loving and prioritizing myself above all. Not in an egotistical way, but in a self care, healthy way.
Many times, during those “foggy” years, I became sad and even lost hope on finding someone who would share my life journey in a loving, caring way.
It wasn’t until I literally decided to dedicate an entire year to myself… Yes… I declared on January 1st of 2015 that that was going to be MY YEAR… that things changed.
“I worked on my personal development, my emotions, my career, my goals, my health, my relationship with myself. I knew that by doing that, I was clearing up space for that special someone to come into my life.” – Click to tweet
I worked on my personal development, my emotions, my career, my goals, my health, my relationship with myself, my self worth. I knew that by doing that, I was clearing up space for that special someone to come into my life.
2016 came and I knew I was ready… I declared that the year when I was going to meet the person who would share this journey with me. Three months later he came into my life and hasn’t left my side. We got engaged five months later, married a year later and are now celebrating our first year anniversary and a baby girl on the way.
I married the person who I specifically had asked God and the Universe to bring to my life. The loving kind, the family type, the adventurer, the supporter, the joker, the serious guy (when he has to), the hardworking guy, the traveler, the caregiver. The one who makes me laugh and supports all my craziness..
I manifested him but only when I KNEW that I was ready and then I didn’t force it, I didn’t look for it, I didn’t get desperate, I let things flow.. and here I am…eternally grateful for this wonderful gift.
Hopefully this will shed some light and hope to you or anyone who you know might be going through something similar.
Be willing to give up your “search” for your perfect match and allow yourself to find your true self. Who you are and how you value yourself will impact any relationship you have in life.
It is time to start valuing yourself for what you’re worth. Love and be compassionate with yourself. It is not narcissistic. It is SELF-LOVE!! Think about it…. if you don’t love yourself enough and you allow others to affect your self-esteem then you will become more vulnerable to hurtful situations and relationships.
You are your own judge. Don’t give others the power to underestimate you or make you feel inferior. Think of what makes you special; of everything that you have to offer to the world. We all have plenty to offer to those around us. Always remembering to first work on your self-love.
- Use daily affirmations
- Learn to tolerate positive feedback
- Don’t be afraid to confront your failings
- Go on a date with yourself
- Understand that no-one is perfect
- And most importantly, learn to love your imperfections
And most importantly always remember to LAF – love unconditionally, accept without judgements, and forgive yourself and others.